Long Day!

Last night B, Daddy and I were playing in B's room. Daddy closed his eyes.

B: Daddy, wake up! It's time for go to school!
Me: Oh, we're going to school! Who will be the teacher?
B: I the teacher. You (pointing to me) the Girl. You (pointing to Daddy) the Boy.
Me: Okay, Teacher B. Teach us!
B: Okay. Everybody, stand up. We're going to jump like THIS (jumping on the bed). Who wants to go first?
[silence . . . lots of gesturing from B trying to get one of us to raise our hand]
B: Mommy, um, The Girl?
Me: Yes?
B: Stand up. Jump like this. I the teacher.
Me: Okay. [attempts to jump on the bed without bashing head into ceiling]
B: Boy (looking at Daddy)? Your turn! [daddy explains that he cannot jump on the bed]
Me: (showing B his pillow pet) Hey, Teacher B! Look what I made!
B: Ooooh, good job! Now go over there and put it in your backpack. Everybody, we're going on a field trip!
Me: We're going on a field trip! Yay! Where are we going, Teacher?

B: We're going to climb up, up, high in the sky and fly around and then we'll go down to the ground today. And then we'll go to Granna and Poppy's house today. And then we'll go to GiGi and PaPa's house today. And then we'll go up in the sky and fly in an airplane, and then go down to the ground today. And then we're going to watch out for ghosts today. And then we're going to watch out for swamp creatures today. And then we're going to hide from monsters today, and say, "watch out! there's a monster coming!" And then we're going to go to the fireman's house and say, "HELP! I'M STUCK IN A TREE!!"

Whew!

Wa wa wa waaaaaah

We were at the SF Ferry Building yesterday and got some sorbet.

I dropped B's on the ground.

He looked down at it and sang:

http://sadtrombone.com/

Um, I can see you.

[category: boring but awesome]

B kept picking at a spot on his face, making it bleed. Today I told him to stop picking it. He kept on and I scolded him. Then he grabbed a pillow, put it over his face, and proceeded to pick under the pillow. I told him, "Dude, I can still see you." And he glanced up guiltily.

Now, I'm sure this happens all the time in families across the globe. That it's a normal occurrence for a "typical" child to hide his face behind an object to disobey his mother. BUT, the fact that he actually thought that I wouldn't know what he was doing under the pillow because (he thought) I couldn't see it - well, it's sheer genius to me. Most of you reading will know why. Those of you who don't, read this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sally-Anne_test

Sheer genius, I say!

Smooch!

Me: B, come give me a kiss.
(B approaches, giving me his forehead to kiss)
Me: I wanna kiss your lips!
(B gives me his forehead)
Me: I want a lip kiss!
B (pointing to forehead): This is lip!

Open & Shut Case

After a long ride with lots of prep for B's behavior at the store, including an elaborate plot by me to create a "let's see who can find the most Super Mario Bros. stuff" game, we learned the store was closed.

Me: OH NO! The store is closed! We're not going to be able to play the game, B, the store is closed. What are we going to do?

B: Um . . . . we can open it!


*****

Also today (this is less entertaining but a first for us so AMAZING), we went swimming with some friends. When Daddy came home B ran to the door: "Hey, Daddy! I went swimming with Jost!"

Just three months ago we were discussing annual goals with his team of teachers/therapists and we all decided that retelling recent events might be a little ambitious for the year . . . . so, yeah, amazing.

I'm gonna eat you!

Wowza.

B was just eating a snack of applesauce and pretzels, and I was thrilled that he offered to share the pretzels with me, so I started a little game and, man-oh-man, he JOINED IN!!!!

Me: Thanks for sharing, B! High pretzel (pushing pretzel toward him)!! Like a high five with pretzel!
B (hits his pretzel with mine, then looks at the pretzel): Hi, pretzel! :)
Me (laughing): Hi, pretzel!! I'm gonna eat you!
B: Fi, fi, fo, fum . . . I'm BIG! I'm gonna eat you pretzel!! (eats pretzel with flourish).
Me (laughing in amazement).
B (getting another pretzel): Mommy, fi fi fo fum, I'm BIG!!!
Me: I'm gonna eat you pretzel!

A bit later:

B (grabbing a broken pretzel, sliding it along table): Hey, Mommy, this is a pirate!
Me: Oh, it's a pirate ship?
B (giving me the pretzel): this is a pirate ship!
Me (singing): I'm a pirate ship and I'm sailing on the ocean . . what's that I see there? It's a great white shark!!
B (PICKS UP HIS SPOON, "SWIMS" IT OVER TO THE "PIRATE SHIP" AND "CHOMPS" THE SHIP!!!!)
Me (stunned!) Then, "naughty, naughty shark!"

We do it again. Then I take the napkin holder and fish for the shark/spoon, catching him, throwing the spoon off the table.

B: Mommy, shark fell down!

So awesome. Then we pretend to be great white sharks and creep/crawl into the living room to attack daddy.

Like I said, WOWZA.

Need anything?

Daddy (from the other room): B, I'm going to the store. Do you need anything?

B: Yeah. I need a hug.