Empathy!!

Talking to B about our upcoming move the other day, and about his best friend, C:

Me: B, are you excited to move to GiGi and PaPa's house?
B: Yes.
Me: How does that make you feel?
B: Happy.
Me: How do you think C will feel?
B: C gonna miss me.



Wow.
Take THAT, Autism!

Story Time

"Reading" a book to me yesterday (looking at a photo of a cat and mouse):

B: Once upon a time, there was a little mouse. And a cat said, "10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1, Ready or not, here I come! Oh, I FOUND YOU!!" And the mouse said, "EEEEK!"

Fun with intraverbals!

This morning B woke up on the proverbial "wrong side of the bed," so Daddy was trying to cheer him up:

Daddy: The itsy bitsy spider went up the water . . .
B: uh . . . spout . . .
Daddy: down came the rain and washed the spider . . .
B: daddy, that's too much to ask.

******

Later, Daddy started singing a song he made up for him when he was 2:

Daddy: My name is B and I'm two-foot-two and I jump all day like a kangaroo. Don't cross my mommy or she will ___________

B: hit me.


[whereupon i fell out of B's bed laughing!]

Danger!

The other morning we were all lounging in bed, and Daddy gave me a quick kiss.

B: No, don't kiss!
Me: Oh, we're going to kiss. (kiss)
B: NO!!
Daddy: I'll kiss mommy if I want to. (kiss)
B: NO . . . people going to get hurt!
Me and Daddy: (laughing, kiss)
B: NO NO NO!!! Somebody going to get hurt!!

Purple Eyes

This morning, B treated me to a few (bossy) gems:

B took my glasses. I asked for them back, and he said, "Um, you have to share, Mommy."

****

I told him the eye doctor said his eyes were perfect. "Perfect?" he asked. "Yes, B, your eyes are perfect. That means you don't need glasses." A few minutes later, he says, "I'm the doctor, and you're the boy. Your eyes are purple."

****

He messed up the settings on the remote control, and I asked him if he wanted me to fix it. Handing it to me, he said, "Yeah, go for it!"

Long Day!

Last night B, Daddy and I were playing in B's room. Daddy closed his eyes.

B: Daddy, wake up! It's time for go to school!
Me: Oh, we're going to school! Who will be the teacher?
B: I the teacher. You (pointing to me) the Girl. You (pointing to Daddy) the Boy.
Me: Okay, Teacher B. Teach us!
B: Okay. Everybody, stand up. We're going to jump like THIS (jumping on the bed). Who wants to go first?
[silence . . . lots of gesturing from B trying to get one of us to raise our hand]
B: Mommy, um, The Girl?
Me: Yes?
B: Stand up. Jump like this. I the teacher.
Me: Okay. [attempts to jump on the bed without bashing head into ceiling]
B: Boy (looking at Daddy)? Your turn! [daddy explains that he cannot jump on the bed]
Me: (showing B his pillow pet) Hey, Teacher B! Look what I made!
B: Ooooh, good job! Now go over there and put it in your backpack. Everybody, we're going on a field trip!
Me: We're going on a field trip! Yay! Where are we going, Teacher?

B: We're going to climb up, up, high in the sky and fly around and then we'll go down to the ground today. And then we'll go to Granna and Poppy's house today. And then we'll go to GiGi and PaPa's house today. And then we'll go up in the sky and fly in an airplane, and then go down to the ground today. And then we're going to watch out for ghosts today. And then we're going to watch out for swamp creatures today. And then we're going to hide from monsters today, and say, "watch out! there's a monster coming!" And then we're going to go to the fireman's house and say, "HELP! I'M STUCK IN A TREE!!"

Whew!

Wa wa wa waaaaaah

We were at the SF Ferry Building yesterday and got some sorbet.

I dropped B's on the ground.

He looked down at it and sang:

http://sadtrombone.com/

Um, I can see you.

[category: boring but awesome]

B kept picking at a spot on his face, making it bleed. Today I told him to stop picking it. He kept on and I scolded him. Then he grabbed a pillow, put it over his face, and proceeded to pick under the pillow. I told him, "Dude, I can still see you." And he glanced up guiltily.

Now, I'm sure this happens all the time in families across the globe. That it's a normal occurrence for a "typical" child to hide his face behind an object to disobey his mother. BUT, the fact that he actually thought that I wouldn't know what he was doing under the pillow because (he thought) I couldn't see it - well, it's sheer genius to me. Most of you reading will know why. Those of you who don't, read this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sally-Anne_test

Sheer genius, I say!

Smooch!

Me: B, come give me a kiss.
(B approaches, giving me his forehead to kiss)
Me: I wanna kiss your lips!
(B gives me his forehead)
Me: I want a lip kiss!
B (pointing to forehead): This is lip!

Open & Shut Case

After a long ride with lots of prep for B's behavior at the store, including an elaborate plot by me to create a "let's see who can find the most Super Mario Bros. stuff" game, we learned the store was closed.

Me: OH NO! The store is closed! We're not going to be able to play the game, B, the store is closed. What are we going to do?

B: Um . . . . we can open it!


*****

Also today (this is less entertaining but a first for us so AMAZING), we went swimming with some friends. When Daddy came home B ran to the door: "Hey, Daddy! I went swimming with Jost!"

Just three months ago we were discussing annual goals with his team of teachers/therapists and we all decided that retelling recent events might be a little ambitious for the year . . . . so, yeah, amazing.

I'm gonna eat you!

Wowza.

B was just eating a snack of applesauce and pretzels, and I was thrilled that he offered to share the pretzels with me, so I started a little game and, man-oh-man, he JOINED IN!!!!

Me: Thanks for sharing, B! High pretzel (pushing pretzel toward him)!! Like a high five with pretzel!
B (hits his pretzel with mine, then looks at the pretzel): Hi, pretzel! :)
Me (laughing): Hi, pretzel!! I'm gonna eat you!
B: Fi, fi, fo, fum . . . I'm BIG! I'm gonna eat you pretzel!! (eats pretzel with flourish).
Me (laughing in amazement).
B (getting another pretzel): Mommy, fi fi fo fum, I'm BIG!!!
Me: I'm gonna eat you pretzel!

A bit later:

B (grabbing a broken pretzel, sliding it along table): Hey, Mommy, this is a pirate!
Me: Oh, it's a pirate ship?
B (giving me the pretzel): this is a pirate ship!
Me (singing): I'm a pirate ship and I'm sailing on the ocean . . what's that I see there? It's a great white shark!!
B (PICKS UP HIS SPOON, "SWIMS" IT OVER TO THE "PIRATE SHIP" AND "CHOMPS" THE SHIP!!!!)
Me (stunned!) Then, "naughty, naughty shark!"

We do it again. Then I take the napkin holder and fish for the shark/spoon, catching him, throwing the spoon off the table.

B: Mommy, shark fell down!

So awesome. Then we pretend to be great white sharks and creep/crawl into the living room to attack daddy.

Like I said, WOWZA.

Need anything?

Daddy (from the other room): B, I'm going to the store. Do you need anything?

B: Yeah. I need a hug.

PWEASE!!!

The other day we were playing Mario Kart Wii and B was being especially bossy about which characters/vehicles we chose. He was screaming and demanding and we told him we couldn't play until he calmed down and asked nicely.

B: I WANT THAT ONE!!!!
Us: B, we're turning the game off if you can't calm down and ask nicely.
B: I WANT THAT ONE, PWEASE!
Us: (ignored)
B: . . . . I SAID "PWEASE!"

Say Mommy Cheese!

They are running!

Walking into school today, B sees some kids playing in the courtyard.

B (pointing to the kids): They are running!

Me: Yes, B, they are running!

(child falls down)

B (pointing to fallen child): Uh-oh, he fell down.

A few minutes later:

Me: B, what happened?

B: He fall down.

[there's seriously so much yummy goodness in these phrases (and POINTING!!!) I can barely contain myself!]

That Cat. You Mommy.

Walking into the house yesterday, our cat cut us off on the sidewalk and began to mew. I answered, "Meow." To which B responded with the following lecture:

"No! Be quiet! No meow. This is kitty-cat. You're Mommy. This (pointing to cat) is kitty-cat. This (pointing to me) is Mommy-bear."

Well, thanks for clearing that up.

White Streak

B hasn't been sleeping lately. Well, he's sleeping once he's asleep but staying up very, very late, running and hopping around like a rabbit and tearing up his room.

Anyway, the other night Daddy tried to get him to sleep in our bed. After 30 minutes of silence, we thought he was down and settled in to watch some t.v. Suddenly a 3.5 foot tall naked white monster streaked past the doorway!

The child was COVERED, from the last hair on his head to the very tip of his toenail, with a very thick layer of lotion. He'd emptied a 32 oz. container of lotion ALL. OVER. HIS. BODY. I steeled myself trying not to laugh but failed miserably, and grabbed my camera to snap up some shots. Into the bath he went for a several-minute spray-down . . . slipping and sliding all over the place.

*sigh* I remember when I used to complain that he didn't get into anything . . .

Here I go again . . .

This is probably about the third or fourth blog I've started with grand intentions . . . no big aspirations this time around -- just making a place to share all the fun and funny things my little man, B, does and says.

He's four, and he has autism, so every word out of that child's mouth is a gift - and man, he's treating us to some doozies these days! Some things are funny, some things are profound, and some are shockingly insightful given how hard we all worked for those first words. So . . . here I go!